Gobble, Gobble!

I have a lot to be thankful for this year...a wonderful family, loving Hubby, great friends, a warm home, furry critters, a job which I love, etc., etc. I am thankful for this community and for you.  Most of all I am thankful to have something wonderful to look forward to now and in the sometime near future. I do want to acknowledge the fact that another holiday rolls by and I am without something I really want...a child to share our love with.  Hubby and I went shopping yesterday at the mall and I think I held back stinging tears twice seeing families. I even said how I can't wait to "cry" tears because I can't wait to be like that family...and I do feel that way. But I know I'm not quite 100% there yet and my tears are more for my jealousy and sadness of what I currently can't have(grrr..go away yucky feelings). I want to hold my child and I want to see their little nose and wipe their tears. Sometimes I don't feel sad and some days I do.  A friend I was introduced to on an online group found out her little one no longer had a heartbeat today and I am reading of some of you lovelies out there dealing with similar pain. It makes me angry and sad for you (and me) and I wish things weren't so hard. Sending love to you all.


 I forgot to mention two things on Monday's post.

1.To celebrate our final homestudy we had Korean food for dinner. Seriously, I think it was the 3rd, maybe 4th time I have ever eaten it.  I am Korean by birth but I never ate it growing up.  I have got to up my spicy food intake and I felt embarrassed when the lady assumed I would want spicy sauce of my hot pot and I quickly said no. I never added any...but did add in kimchee. Little by little...I did enjoy it though and I'm happy it's close to home. Can't wait to take my sister there!

2. After dinner my common thread bracelet fell off.  I noticed it was loose a day or two ago but didn't think it would have fallen off. Hubby thought it was kind of monumental since we just finished our homestudy.  Crazy huh? I will tell you I cried a few tears and insisted on making a new one...my wrist looks funny without it and IF will be a part of my life forever. Not that I will wear it forever, but I think I still need it now.

Here is today's yesterday's news.. we paid the rest of our homestudy fees and the country admin fee. We also got some clarification from our placing agency on what Mrs. S (our social worker) should put in our homestudy for the age of child(ren) we would like to adopt...0-18 months at time of referral.  Hopefully, this puts us past the age of having to redo some of paperwork, but we shall see. We also applied to refinance our mortgage which was not a part of today's plan (neither was our original drive by attempt to reorder checks) but it happened (and took forever..."10-15 minutes my ass"....try an hour and 15!) and we are thankful. It's something we have been wanting to do and couldn't for whatever reasons. We ended the night by eating cereal for dinner (hah!) and went and watched The Muppets, which I loved. Ahh, I love good days.

I hope you have a nice Thanksgiving, fairly pain free and full of yummy food. Ours will be very low key with my Mom and Grandma. Cheers to you!