Thursday, September 1, 2011

Trying not to think........

...but it's not really working out so hot.  I am fine all day at school. I don't have a second for it to cross my mind. Then I drive home and sit in my commute (especially the last two days...leaving work during rush hour...not smart) and think and think.  I am trying not to read into anything but I feel like maybe things are a little different. And damn it...I hope they are!!! But I also know that although I am really trying to be positive, I have a very deep fear that this FET didn't work and that's it for us on the IF treatment front. But I know, somehow, somewhere we will be parents. And we will be awesome!

Okay...can I tell you more of what I am feeling? Crampy again on and off, boobs sore (always are and totally not surprised), still have hot hands and feet, I ate a ton of food today because I felt so hungry at certain points (please let this not be the medicine) and I am feeling thirsty at times, too.  I am only associating being tired from surviving the first three days of Kindergarten.  I knew I was going to be dead by Wednesday....I have never started teaching on a Monday. Always a Wednesday or Thursday!  Last night I passed out on the dear, sweet Hubby even made my second batch of play dough. Isn't he awesome?!

I have asked Hubby about how he's feeling.  He says he wants to know just as bad as I do. Really wishing there wasn't a holiday this weekend! Oh and my principal is letting me sneak in on Tuesday after my beta without calling in a sub. My dad's wife is a sub in our district (and retired K/1 teacher!) and since I am pretty sure I can make it by 8 she said it would be okay for her to open my room and start the day if needed. Hooray for not having to use another personal day!

News in the down to 22 kiddos....14 boys, 8 girls. We added a fifth Kinder today. I am so amazed at how well these kiddos are doing. I am loving my class so far and it is so rewarding to see how they are already learning some of the routines after 3 days!! whoo hoo!

Believe it or not, this is the latest I have been up all week.  In bed/passed out on the couch around 10 each night....that is a miracle in itself.  I've decided my goal this year is to "try" to break my bad habit of night owl teacher. Not a good combo, but I survive.  I've been getting up with my alarm and so far so good.

Goodnight!!! =0)


  1. Your symptoms sounds very promising, but agree....don't over-think anything in the 2WW!! Hang in there Kelli!

  2. Hang in there!! It is so hard to not over analyze every little things! I'm so glad your little kinder kids are doing well. I read what you said about the differences of teaching different grades. The little tiny ones would drive me nuts I think! I loved 3rd grade the most during student teaching and when I was a special ed teacher for 3 years.

  3. Hang in there, Kelli! Cramping is a great sign. My only successful cycle is the one that I had cramping, so I'm hoping that this is a good sign for you. Hopefully, you'll be able to enjoy the long weekend and not stress too much! Thinking of you.

  4. Hoping these are good signs for you - just a few more days and you will know for sure! Hope you have something fun planned for the weekend to keep your mind off of it (well, as much as possible anyway!) Thinking of you and fingers are crossed!!

  5. having hot hands and feet is a good sign! i am normally a cold person and love to sleep with lots of blankets at night, but a couple days before my beta i started getting really hot at night and slept without blankets. Cramping is also a good sign - I definitely had that! I'll be thinking of you and will keep my fingers crossed.

  6. Oh man ladies......I am trying to remain positive that this is it! So nerve wracking! Thanks for your kind thoughts!